What if the person isn't tired? What if that is how they want to look? You basically just insulted them. It is one of the few sneaky insults that society has allowed over time.
You wouldn't say, "Hey, you look bad today!" Instead, people say, "You look tired." It has nearly the same meaning.
Now, I understand that this phrase might be used in some situations, especially if you know the person well. Lets say they have bags under their eyes, are laying down on the table, and are basically asleep. Then it would be okay to bring up tiredness.
You can read this if you want, but I sure won't.
I would read this if I were you, it is a lot better. But I still probably won't read it.
I would, however, read this for sure. This is a good article, I will probably blog about it more later.
I would, however, read this for sure. This is a good article, I will probably blog about it more later.
This brings me to another subject: sharing gum.
Are you always expected to share gum? Every time I bring out a pack of gum, I have 5 people pestering me for a piece. Comon man, I saved up some good money for that gum. You expect me to have to give away a pack every time I want one piece? No way. Now, if it is just you and one or two other people, you could offer them a piece, but I don't think its required. If their breath stinks, its not your fault.
To counter this, I have started bringing out gum in secret. I will open the pack in my backpack, and slowly sneak the piece above my desk. There, I will try to unwrap it in my hands, so nobody else will see. I then sneak it into my mouth, usually by "coughing."
Lets say you're super rich and have tons of gum. There is a fun game you can play with the people that want a piece. The game's called...
See What You Can Make People Do For a Piece Of Gum
It can be anything. Make someone sing a Disney song. Make someone do 10 push ups on the class room floor. Make them give you a high five. Make them ask out the girl sitting next to you.
You can also try operant conditioning on them. Have them give you a high five, and then give them a piece of gum. Every time they give you a high five, give them gum. Eventually they will associate a "high five" with "receiving gum." Every time you high five, they will expect gum. This could lead to fun thing...
On tiredness:
ReplyDeleteThis is all a matter of perspective. You are assuming tired to be something that is an undesirable quality. Perhaps somebody would take this as a compliment. Take for example the following scenario.
"You look tired"
"Thank you. I have been working very hard. I'm glad you appreciate that."
Perhaps it is more of an insult to accuse somebody of looking well-rested. What is it they have accomplished besides sleep?
In my opinion, tired does not share negative connotations in the way the word "bad" or "ugly" does, and thus is perfectly acceptable to bring up in conversation.
On Gum:
In short, yes. Generally speaking, it is considered rude to indulge yourself in front of people without so much as offering to share, especially when you have plenty. This is very true of gum, which costs less than pocket change per piece.
Generally, people do not want to look "tired." Your statement seems a little ridiculous. Maybe it would be true if you were a powerful scientist.
ReplyDeleteOn gum:
If you want gum, bring it yourself. There is no social rule about this (especially if you are in class, surrounded by ten gum-wanters). Gum is expensive, and poor people like me, without a job, have trouble saving up for gum.
Well, I'd rather somebody told me I look tired than tell me I look bad. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteIn my book, it's not even an insult. Not at all. Looking tired doesn't necessarily mean you look bad. I've encountered lots of attractive, tired looking people.
Which brings me to a story...I was working an eight hour shift at Target, and basically, after one point, a ton of customers (and yes, I do literally mean a ton. I'm sure, put together, their weight could easily reach 2000 pounds) who came through my lane told me I looked exhausted. It was something to do with my expression, they said, not my appearance. SEEEEEE, it doesn't always mean you look bad?
About gum. Wow. So you know how much everybody wants gum, and yet, you still have to dangle it in their face with ruthlessness, and make them undergo a bout of CLASSICAL (not operant) conditioning. (Here, the gum would be the US, the satisfaction would be the UR, and the high five would be the CS).
This comment has gone on for too long, and I should go. I will see you when we go shop!
As for tired, it is a personal preference if you like being called it. ("In my book")
ReplyDeleteThe only time I can see "your tired" as a complement would be after a long night of crazy parties. Even then, it usually doesn't mean you are looking especially good that day...
And there are many, many more unattractive tired people than attractive tired people. Maybe thats because the attractive people are never tired?
As for gum...The high five is the behavior you want to increase. Giving them gum upon completion of behavior is the positive reinforcement.
Because in a high five, both people must move. If I were to say, have an easy button, and click that button before I gave them gum, it would be classical conditioning.
I still don't see you look tired as an insult. Just a neutral sort of comment.
ReplyDeleteAnd of course it was operant conditioning. Don't listen to me anymore. I fail chemistry tests, remember? hehe