A simple google search of "controversy" yeilds wonderous results (7,810,000 in .09 seconds). Not surprisingly, wikipedia is the first result. Wikipedia in itself is a controversial topic.
I found this website. It has a list of every single controversial topic known to man (and woman). I decided to pick on of these topics. The topic I pick is...Animal Experimentation.
I don't like that topic. The new topic is...
"WAIT A SECOND! You cheater! You can't pick a topic and not even write about it! You flip-flopper! I will never vote for you!"
See folks? I just created controversy without even having a topic. Well, I guess the topic was controversy itself. Controversy can be controversial, or sometimes it can't. Sometimes controversy (think gay rights) makes friends, other times it makes enemies (think gun rights). Sometimes controversy can be democratic (think democracy), other times it is dictatorial (think Hitler). In fact, I didn't even know dictatorial was a word! How controversial!
Controversy is everywhere, and yet is nowhere. But controversy, always, is where.
"Enough of this nonsense Mikey! Get to the Controversial topic!"
Well screw you, pretend audience! I ain't gettin to any controversial topics today!
In fact, the word "ain't" is a controversial topic in itself.
"Ain't Ain't a word and I Ain't gonna say it!"
Damn you audience! You hypocritical people! How can you say "ain't" isn't a word, and then say it three times in one sentence?!
Webster's dictionary defines "ain't" as: "A word". Since I trust Webster (he won the Webster Hayne debates) I will believe him.
"Ain't is a word, and therefore I feel comfortable saying it when necessary"
So take that, you condescending audience. I just discussed a controversial topic. Happy now?
"NO! I don't like that topic! Pick a new topic!"
Again, you hypocritical audience...Didn't you reprimand me a few words ago for doing the exact same thing? That's it, guards, please.
The sound of machine guns fills the stage (Or blog, in this case. Just imagine there are machine gun sound effects) (No wait, I take that back, I will add machine gun sound effects. Play the sound below for ultimate experience) (Make sure to turn up your volume really loud) (If this were a math problem, it would be a toughie. Imagine distributing all these words through 4 sets of parenthesis.) (Make that 5 sets of parenthesis) (Make that six...anyway, listen to the sounds).
Good, no more audience. Without an audience, there is no need to write. Unless of course, I am writing for myself.
And who rights for themselves these days? Not me.
pic made at
http://bighugelabs.com/motivator.php
websta's dictionary from
http://www.writehisanswer.com/Merriam%20Webster%20Dictionary.jpg
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